NC State's Krispy Kreme Challenge: 3rd Time's a Charm, Or Not

It is finished. Three hours ago the gun went off at the start of my 3rd ever Krispy Kreme Challenge, an ESPN-reported, 5-mile charity race for the NC Children's Hospital. It's slightly-crazy competitors have to chomp down a dozen donuts at the halfway point of the there-and-back sprint from the Memorial Belltower on campus to Raleigh's iconic Krispy Kreme. It's NC State's undisputed most well-known tradition, having started as a dare between a couple of undergraduates in 2004. With a time 52:42 I technically completed the race as as a successful "Challenger" (versus those non-commital "Casual Runners"). Having done this twice before, I thought it would be easier than ever. It wasn't. The biting wind cut through the 30-something degree air. People crashed and burned. I even threw up. This is my story.

It started with me and Kyle, a long-time friend and fellow townhouse renter, driving to NCSU's campus. We would be splitting up at the starting line so I could begin towards the front with fellow members of the club cross country team and he would meet up with his friends and brother. This was the third year for both of us, so we were well prepared. Dressing in easily-shed layers and carrying cell phones to meet up with each other after the race, we felt like veterans. Although experience is a big mental advantage for the overall race, it does little to help cope with the physical challenges the KKC provides.

Even being a seasoned runner provides only a slight advantage against the rest of the field. Packed together like sardines about 20 feet back from the starting line (the best we could do in the 8000+ crowd), we discussed our race goals. The highest placing team member from the previous year, Daniel, had placed 7th and ran a 32:04 against a tough field in relatively amiable weather. Several guys hoped to best his performance, especially now that Rodger, our track coordinator, was keeping track of best-times, both for the season and all-time. Regardless of how fast you ran the 2.5 miles each way, however, your time ultimately came down to your donuts eating ability. The previous year I put them down in a painfully long 19 minutes. I hoped to destroy that statistic and finish them in under 10 minutes, giving me a shot at being in the first 50-100 finishers.

The crowd was as diverse as ever. We were elbow-to-elbow with a pair of Duke student's, one of which donned a Cameron Crazies T-shirt. Posse's of UNC - Chapel Hill students were scattered around, approximately 75% of them sporting baby blue toboggans. Then there were the characters- people who take on a different (or maybe their actual) identity by dressing up to stand out amongst the crowd. There were the superheros: Iron man, Link (young or old? couldn't tell), Captain America, and a host of others that were less mainstream including rugged old men in patriotic garb, stout women with colorful yet powerful personas, a pair of full-costume (I'm talking Disney World level here) gerbils, and a Pac-man to scale. I'm talking a home-made partial circle of close to 5 feet diameter and two feet deep (even better- there was an equally awesome spooky ghost behind him). Finally there were the Krispy Kreme Challenge Spartans, a group of ripped athletic guys who wear only speedos and a cape and who don giant cardboard shields. I was invited to join them (via the  official Facebook group) but alas, my stature is far less than spartan and so I kept my usual spot with the skinny runners.

After a surprisingly not-chilly 15 minutes of waiting, we were off. The crowd is too large to warrant a microphone announcement so the gun start can sneak up on you. It went off at exactly 8:30 but even at our relatively good starting point it took 12 seconds to get to the chip-timed line that officially started our times. Some of the folks at the back have reported up to 4-minutes of shuffling to the starting line. Once you get out of the chute, at least if you are towards the front, it's a fast downhill start. This year the organizers attempted to make pace groups (Two exactly: a 5 minute mile group at the front and a "6-9"minute mile group twenty feet back. These groupings were a good idea in theory, but probably not worth the trouble in reality).

It was great to run past fellow Wolfpackers, some of which I knew and yelled out to, instilling a sense of comradely and pride at the thought of all of us doing this incredibly stupid activity together. I started slow compared to the rest of the XC team, but was probably in the first one or two hundred runners. Many of these folks were casual runners and some were banditing. My GPS watch put my pace at between 5:30 and 6:00 for the first mile and 6:04 overall for the first leg. I slowed down massively going up the large Peace Street hill, even being passed by what seemed to be a high school girl in a pink tutu. That motivated me to pick up the pace until I ran through the volunteer gauntlet handing out boxes of donuts. Just like in the Easter Egg hunts of childhood, it is most advantageous to run to the end and resist picking up the reward at the first available opportunity. No need to run with the box for an extra 100 meters.

I joined the team, which was settled in at its usual spot. Some folks had nearly half the box finished when I arrived but others were just chomping down on their first donuts. The ground was relatively clean at this point, but wouldn't be for long. I started on the first doughnut. My plan was to pace myself at one per 30 seconds, but I quickly realized that would not be sustainable. I did my usual, squishing them into groups of three or four. They were cold and cakey. Nothing at all like the hot morsels I hand actually enjoyed on a practice run on Wednesday. "You've got to dunk them in water" somebody said. I tried, and gagged at the mushy mush I had created: and this was only after four or five! My ten minute goal came and went with only 7 or so donuts down.Things were not looking good.

If you were to graph the amount of donut ingested versus time, it would be a logarithmic function. I quickly tapered as the gag reflex kicked in. Apparently ten minutes is the amount of time you can eat any amount of food without feeling full; I disagree, but regardless I was past the 10-minute mark. At 15 minutes I think I had half of a stack of four left. I finished in 20:30, meaning it took me 5:30 to finish the equivalent of 2 donuts. The ending was rough. I knew it would be from experience, but this was worse than expected. I seemed to be gaining about 3 minutes of eating time each Challenge since Freshman year.

With that, me and Pomeroy, the only other remaining challenger from our original circle of mastication, set off together for the last leg. The person who checked to make sure our boxes were empty was Caiti, a friend standing in front of the giant pile of sugary disposed cardboard. She had helped organize this year's challenge, specifically the water stations, and she cheered us on. That, combined with Pomeroy's brazen shouting of "PUSH THROUGH THE PEOPLE" spurred me to sprint around the block lined with people offering additional doughnuts and on down the Peace Hill. We dodged and weaved around great packs of hobby joggers, baby strollers, little kids,  beefy slow-moving men and folks being dragged down by costumes. Passing people at the rate we were would probably indicate world-record pace in a normal race, but this was the KKC, and a significant amount of these people were casual runners or failed challengers. As the terrain switched to the St. Mary's Hill uphill, I saw a person almost eat the sidewalk. The glaze-induced stupor was getting at a fair amount of competitors, including myself. For the first time ever, I gagged during the race.

A few minutes later, over the main hill but now striding up Hillsborough Street to the finish, I saw a 10 feet long squiggle (it literally did loop-dee-loops) of vomit in the middle of the road and almost lost my own doughnuts. Glancing at my watch, I realized that at the pace I was going I would not meet my goal of running under 50 minutes, now matter how hard I kicked it at the finish. I settled into a 7 minute pace and a smooth rhythm to keep from puking. After rounding the traffic circle I crossed the line and was finished. I staggered back to Holiday Hall, our meeting place, and spied Pomeroy letting loose the calories he had absorbed 20 minutes before. Technically, throwing up was only grounds for disqualification for challengers during the race. Afterwards, it was fair game.

I joined him. It was only the third time I'd thrown up in the previous 12 years, and the first time ever it was self-initiated. My justification for doing so was that I was on the verge of it anyway, and my body knew what was best for it. It was loud. Later on I would run into another friend of mine in the Spartan brigade. He had tripped and skinned one knee and bruised the other, forcing him to walk on the way back. The challenge is tough.

Matt, another member of the club team, had cheered me on a significant distance down Hillsborough Street, indicating he had finished quite early (13th). Rodger would take home the fastest finish of the day, however, for the team or any NC State student. He grabbed 4th, a 3-place improvement over Daniel's finish the year before. Still, it was a minute slower finish than Daniel's time, indicating the challenge had become less competitive, at least at the highest level of competition.

Last year the KKC raised over $150,000 for the Hospital and I imagine it topped that this year. It's a great event for both charity and for getting people introduced to running events. It's also NCSU's greatest tradition, despite it being only 9 years old. I know I'll run it next year, which will make it once for each year at NC State. If you haven't before and are curious about it, I recommend you run it as well. If the challenge sound's like too much, be a casual runner, or at just give it a shot. There is no throw up patrol. There's no mile splits. And there's no material prize for the winner. It 's all for fun, charity, challenge and tradition.

And a free 2400 calorie breakfast.